TheHatter.net

I have read lots of blogs and postings about how to make money with photography. This annoys me so much that I have to write about it again and again and… There is lots of different people in writing those, some don’t have a glue about markets, they just assume things as they have bought a brand new camera. Then there is some older farts, that has taken pics when they own the only camera in the village and still they manage to go with that old thrust developed in the early days. Nobody likes their photos, but as they are always been…

Then there is that most annoying group. Those who has the eye for pics and social skills needed for selling themselves. They start taking extra money with keeping blogs for subscribers and selling books and  seminars to the people who just don’t have it and will never get it, but are anxious to pay for it.

Well… Here are my tips to become wealthy.

Step 1.

Buy the most expensive equipment. Doesn’t matter if you ever needed all the functions those provide, but oh boy they look nice and people are easy to get jealous with’em. In profession them expensive stuff rises the confidence. Your clients think “Oh boy, but that guy is pro.”

Step 2.

Spread all your photos, all over the internet and brag with them a lot. Collect also a inside gang that helps you with that bragging. Make everyone to think that you’re the man and simply the only one who is capable of taking decent pictures. Doesn’t matter if you can’t take photos, nobody will ever notice that.

Step 3.

When you have had a little practice, hire a top makeup artist, excellent model and an excellent stylist and take a couple of pics. Then send those pics to good retoucher, who will make’em good. After that make your portfolio with those pics and send it to everywhere. Then wait your phone to ring. In a while waiting, remember to brag your stuff more.

Step 4.

Fill your Lotto-ticket every week (you can use my numbers above) and wait for jackpot. When that strikes… Wham… You’re wealthy.

Keeps on going busy. Just noticed that I haven’t been writing over a month. Guess there hasn’t been that much to write to either. Had a couple of leisure kind of not so commercial photoshoots although. One was a BDSM entrepreneur Diva Mirandas promo photos. Those were quite interesting to shoot as the place were almost smaller than my toilet Then there was a TFP-shoot with one young lad, there were nothing new under the sun in that shoot. Just that ordinary stuff. Otherwise the work has gone by the everyday tracks. Weekends in weddings and weekdays with child-, pregnancy-, and graduation-photos. Rest of the time goes by sitting in front of a computer retouching photos. Not much commersials thou, guess it’s called the recession. Few editorials have been done, atleast.

With an other eye following different news feeds and chats. Usually during the printing, I have watched all kinds of youtube videos of strobe photography. O’ boy  there is all sorts of experts, that gives lessons. In many videos it is quite clear ready in the begin, that those guys don’t have a slightest glue about studio photography. They are almost as bad as those marketing gurus that  writes those nonsense blogs about how become best everything. At least that gives a good laughs.

That has made me wonder, as it has done so many times before and every time I have wrote the same things in my blog. What is happening to the photography. There is already a massive amount of so called professional photographers that has none what so ever idea of the process, where the photo is exposed to the light sensitive plane. They are those so called self made men, they have watched those inaccurate youtube-videos and practised taking pictures and repeatedly made the same mistakes over and over, without noticing them.

No man is an island, they say, so teaching and socialising is needed, but in my opinion there has to be some limits in what you are allowed to call teaching and take money of it. It’s different if there is said, that we are here just to talk bull and taking photos, you are welcome to join, but it’s the whole new ballgame, if there is promised a ultimate truth for exchange of a money.

One thing more is that when reading things over Internet or watching the videos in youtube, has to understand that, those things don’t necessary teach nothing. They simply shows how things are done incorrectly.

Well boys and girls, that was about it this time. I’ll write more when something happens, if something will ever happen…

Dear diary. I admit to neglecting you quite a lot recently and it’s been a while I haven’t had time to…  Neah, just been busy with real life and haven’t got the strenght to socialise. But… this one I have to share with ya folks. Couple of days ago I went to  Ikea as I was passing by (Infact I went there to eat those cheap meatballs ). Just wondering around, when I discover discount table and there was one ceiling lamp already called Foto. Then the ephiphany strike. I have never had a decent beatydish, that has a little suppressed beam and that thing was there, almost ready to use.

Photo of a lamp out of a box. Lampholder has been removed.

Sawed the head off for the bayonet install.

Installed the bayonet with rivets. I cut the flange to small sections and bend few of them to dome.

Dish fit quite nicely to flashhead.

Then a final touch. A light blocking plate in front of flashtube with aluminium rod and plate.

And best of all… The light is just what I was looking for. Precise and smooth. All that for 10 euros as I have the spare bayonet in shelf, othervise that would had added the cost with 25 euros. Have to say, I’m pleased.

Oh boy, but it has been a busy week. Saturday I went to shoot disco dance Finnish championship competition, twelve hours of running around the dance floor and couple of hours driving between cities. After that I  noticed that working behind computer don’t count as exercise. Muscles were aching for two days so that climbing a stairs was something horrible. Never the less pics turned out quite nice. Guess it’s like Arnold said No pain no gain.

Then the next day it was again couple of hundred kilometers of driving and portraitphotographer of the year competition. I took part of that competition first time of my life, with average pictures and because of that, my rank was also average. I’ll call that mostly a field trip for competition, as the entrance fee was almost the same as fee in participating. With that money I got the evaluation of my pics almost free. This year have to try to find the time to take suitable pictures to next years competition.

Then a dull hotelnight and in next day it was a market day for fotosupplies and a demonstration, how to take a good graduation picture. Watched that for a couple of hours and discovered that there’s nothing new under the sun and left home.

Next day there was a editorial photo shoot for a some wellness-magazine, simple little task that was given day before and have to be done day before that, as usual. Shoot went fine and then pics to server and bill and usage contract to mail. Now waiting that astronomical compensation to arrive.

Then once again I began to wonder that world isn’t ready for social media before  2030 if even then. People use twitter for something utterly useless. They either brag about their success or let us know about some useless events, like how cute squirrel is in the  PowerPoint presentation they saw. But that’s ok. More than that i’m arrogated in the use of tools like Facebook, that is excellent for publish the events and inviting people to those. Even better it is for planning and organising events, but… why in the hell it ends, when the event is held. There is no post-processing in those events. When it’s held, the wall closes and no pr is distributed via it. Then it stays visible long after that, but any info is no longer gathered nor any feedback received. Damn, but why it is so hard.

Wednesday was one of those busy days. Wake up at 6.30 driving 150km to Tampere. Four hours of photoshoot to catalogue and then more driving to Helsinki 200km to watch Jens Haugen,  Norwegian photographer explained his work methods and by the side couple of guys tried to sell Profoto flashes and Hasselblad H4D cameras.

Profoto flashes seems to be as unreliable as any other sets. Time to time the sales persons has to come and make some mystical adjustments. Same thing was with the new Hasselblad and Phocus software. But never the less Jens was able to make some photos. Have to say, (sorry abt that Jens) that the lighting wasn’t so special. Just an ordinary photo school stuff, that is told in early lessons. That was little amusing, that the great invention was the thing that is the basic routine in school. Photoshop was prostuff, but all together it was that old school desaturation, inner contrast style montage. Nothing new under the sun, guys in Kuvaamo has done that for ages.

In a beginning Jens told about his past and how he started taking pics. It depressed me a little, seems that to become a photographer, you don’t have to know anything at all. All that is needed is, that you have to be rockstar, celebrity or pretty young girl. The thing he was right about was, nobody comes to offer you job, you have to go and get it. Have to develop your own style and relentlessly send your pics and talk to right person about yourself. In photography the last mile isn’t about how good photographer you are, but who do you know and does he/she like you.

Funny, how it goes. It’s been almost a month since i last time wrote to this blog. Nothing special has happen in that time, just that ordinary work. Couple of wedding portraits, couple of child portraits and couple of bulk shootings, nothing to mention about. Taking part of a photo competition, but more about that, when the results will be announced. Just an ordinary shots, guess with that effort, there will be just an ordinary ranking.

Then suddenly, the next week just exploded my calendar with special things, that have to be placed in between daily job. Tuesday there is couple of interviews i wouldn’t mind, but then Wednesday early in the morning I’m in a way to Tampere for catalogue shooting and from there to Helsinki for camera/photo demo, quick sleepover at home and then in a way to Turku to shoot disco dance competition and from there back to Tampere to union meeting and competition photo evaluation for two days. Just quickly calculate that I’ll be sitting in my car for 20 hours. That’s over two full legal workdays.

Is the real work really like this nowadays, sitting in a car and talking bull… and a little so called work in between.

This was all together a little interjection and will I’ll be writing some more specific in next week.

Wednesday evening I was watching and listening a great gothpostpunkband Murnau’s Playhouse in Tampere. Take some photos too, as the camera was with me. That was fun, but the gig did make me wonder, why don’t people go to seen those gigs in Finland. Big concerts with foreign artists are always sold out and tickets are sold in black market in preposterous price. There was couple dozen people, though the tickets were practically free.

More obscure that becomes, when you think that here in small town, where it’s impossible to go those gigs, as there is none. How could it be more enjoyable to sit in home in front of computer or telly, than go among other people and enjoy someones creative work instead of global ready chewed formats.

Oh boy, but if I were still living one of those bigger citys, I defenately would spend all my spare evenings in clubs and other places where is good ole performing artists. Well… To be a heretic to my own words, there is a burlesky show tonight, but due my personal reasons, mentioned earlier here, i won’t be there. Still must participate more to those events, if someone just organizes ones.

Btw. Murnau’s Playhouse in nominee for the album of the year in deathrock.com

Deep in the bosom of the gentle night
Is when I search for the light
Pick up my pen and start to write
I struggle, fight dark forces
In the clear moon light
Without fear… insomnia
I can’t get no sleep -Faithless

Stopped drinking coffee and now the sciatica is keeping me wake. Funny how it always does that after couple of days without coffee. well… Guess it goes by as usual. I’ve also struggled with some sort of burnout, which has kind of paralyzed all my creativeness for last three years. Now it seem to be getting by and things are clearing up.There is still a final push, so hope that there is enough energy for that.

As the things are looking better i have started couple of projects as there would be something else than work. One is a portrait competition, for which i have photoshopped one picture two days now and the other is a longer project called Corlissania Project. It’s a mix of glamour portraiture and steampunk blended with hint of a graphical outlook.  Now there is a massive work for all props and finding models, stylists and makeup. Nice steamlike places are also hard to find. One pic has already been taken and for that i manage to speek myself shooting in steam museum, where is conserved one of the Finland’s biggest steam engine or in fact two of them, Helen and Marie. More of that later…